PK: The apparent homo sapien whisperer

September 22, 2019

I’m good with the people stuff, as it were. No, I’m not bragging. I’ve never thought that was a very good look. Tooting one’s own horn = bad form, egotistic, patently rude and just kinda icky. Now, if I’m gushing about the sheer wonderfulness that is my child, well, that’s another matter entirely. I suppose we proud moms tend to get obnoxious from time to time. We’re sorry. Especially cause it’s not stoppin’ us any time soon. Or ever. I digress. Anybody who knows me will tell ya, PK is a big fan of the other humans. I dig ’em. I smile at them for no ...

The actual, bona fide, fish-killing last straw

September 15, 2019

Remember the original Flo? No, not the Progressive Insurance gal. I’m talking about the factionary waitress who worked for the pretend boss Mel at the made-up diner of the same name in the 1970s / ’80s sitcom “Alice.” I loved that show. It’s the story of a young widow who scoops up her preteen son to hit the open road from Jersey to sunny California to start a brand new life. Along the way, she winds up having to take a waitressing job at Mel’s Diner. There, she befriends her fellow waitresses, sweet but simple Vera and sassy, streetwise Flo. Flo often invited Mel, as ...

Kimerers have been standing in lines for 129 years

September 8, 2019

Remember that “Seinfeld” episode when Jerry rented a car at the airport but, upon trying to pick it up, was told, “There aren’t any cars. We ran out.” Jerry built an entire schtick about how anyone can TAKE a reservation, but it’s really the HOLDING of the reservation that’s the key ingredient in the recipe. And last Sunday, my mom and I had a Seinfeld-esque moment when I drove her to the bakery to pick up the cake she’d ordered several days prior. She was told her confections would be boxed and ready to travel at noon. So, we walked in at 12:03 p.m. and immediately ...

Celebrating Memorial, Er, I mean Labor Day

August 31, 2019

Well, clearly, I am in denial. If I’ve done it once, I’ve done it two dozen times. In fact, during the course of the weekly e-bulletin I write at my day job, I did it thrice. THREE TIMES in a single newsletter! Yep. Just as I do every year around this time, I keep accidentally referring to Labor Day as Memorial Day. Oops. It’s not that Memorial Day shouldn’t be commemorated every single day of the year in honor of our military members who gave the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom. And it’s not that Labor Day isn’t an important occasion for us to come together as a ...

Like a watched pot, a watched phone never rings

August 25, 2019

Remember that saying “A watched pot never boils”? I’m pretty sure it was that pauper dude who coined all the brilliant phrases that he apparently didn’t want people to know Benjamin Franklin was really saying. So the founding father / inventor / brainiac made up the pseudonym “Poor Richard” and tossed all those noggin nuggets in an annual pamphlet dubbed “Poor Richard’s Almanac.” It ran from 1732 to 1758, according to Wikipedia, and covered every topic from weather patterns to astronomy to complicated mathematical theories to natural remedies to, of course, sage ...

Kimerer takes a bubble bath; the media goes wild

August 18, 2019

Remember the movie “Arthur” starring Dudley Moore, Liza Minnelli and the always scene-stealing actor extraordinaire, Sir John Gielgud? That was a pretty funny flick. I was 11 when it was released, so I do recall having to wait to watch it until several years afterward when it finally made its way to broadcast TV in a heavily edited version. Yes, wee ones, back in the 1980s when dinosaurs roamed freely about, it took many moons for a movie to transition from big to small screen. Like, longer than it takes to send a text on your Grandpa’s flip phone. Either way. It’s a snappy, ...