I trust that you’re trendy enough to have ditched your top sheets. What? Don’t tell me that you’re still using those old things. I knew that I wasn’t with it, but I thought you would be. It seems that hipsters have put the top sheet to bed by leaving it off the bed. That leaves ...
I meant to write an insightful, thought-provoking column this week but got sidetracked scrolling through memes and social media wisecracks. It left me with plenty of imponderables to ponder: ・ How many boys are still stuck at the bottom of some abandoned well because they thought their dog ...
“Gramps, what was it like living before color?” The old man scratched his white beard. “Before color what?” “My teacher showed us photos from the old days. Everything was black and white.” The puzzled look on the old man’s face smoothed into a crooked grin. “It was a lot ...
Editor’s note: While Burt is out taking a nap, we are making do with this Cole Classic that originally ran May 14, 2000. Making do is one of the things I do best. There is no reason to invest the time, money and effort required to do a project the so-called “right way” when “making ...
Thinking about getting married? Are you already signed, sealed and delivered, and wish to stay that way? Gather around, youngsters, as your gray-haired Uncle Burtie divulges how to talk to the woman you desperately hope to keep. Actually, I’m still working on the things TO say. But in my ...
Every fall, it’s the same torturous ordeal. But do I remember to squeeze into a hollow log in the woods? Sign up for a seven-hour board meeting? Or jump off the roof and break my arms to avoid all the pain? No. I only remember these pleasant alternatives a half-second after my sweetie ...
