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It's not that I am a complete cranky pants. Well, not totally, anyway. In fact, I am fairly optimistic by nature.
It's just that, lately, I have to admit that I've become irritated by a great number of things.
・ Firstly, there's the family of mice that thinks they share my address.
Every time I see another little varmint caught in one of the traps, which we apparently need to keep setting all around the house, I'm like, "Dude! You have the entire outside! This is MY house, not yours -- SCRAM!" GRRRRRR.
・ Then there's the less-than-spectacular U.S. Olympic team showing this go round. Sure, I know we have garnered a few more medals in the last few days but come on, Red, White and Blue! We can't let the ROC kick our behinds around the moon. Not after beating them there, and all!
Oh, and speaking of the Olympics and the Russians ...
・ What is the deal with Russian figure skater Kamila Valiev? Why on earth would this healthy 15-year-old be on coronary artery disease medication usually prescribed to senior citizens with heart issues if not to enhance her performance?
Somehow, the powers-that-be decided that doping, in this particular case, is fine. Huh?
・ Also, there's the whole Ben Affleck / J-Lo spectacle. Hey, it's not that I don't wish them well and all but, um, honestly, I just really don't care if they're a couple or not, a'ight? Why do I have to get breaking news alerts every time they canoodle? Let's save those for important stuff, please, people? #OverIt
・ Ah, about the Big Game. Adding insult to injury (of course I wanted the Bengals to win the Super Bowl), this year's commercials were, gosh, how can I say this with the utmost political correctness? Um, they pretty much stunk.
Especially bad, in my humble opinion, was the Uber Eats / Uber Don't Eats ad. Just because you jam pack a spot with a ton of celebrities doesn't mean that even THEY can save a truly dumb theme. Sorry, marketing department at Uber Eats but … epic fail.
・ Don't even get me started on the Christmas card ponzi scheme. Yeah, yeah, I know, it's months away from the holiday, but I, for one, want to speak out on behalf of those of us who've stopped sending out Christmas and / or holiday cards.
Look, it's not that I don't love my family and friends and want them to have happiness at the holidays (and every day, in fact!). It's just that, between the cards and stamps, I nearly have to take out a home equity line of credit just to send around some holiday cheer, ya know?
To all my Peeps, please forgive me but I have officially retired from the Christmas card game.
・ Finally, why does Starbucks have to be so complicated? I mean, I get that there are hot and cold coffee drinks but the sheer array of them at this place is ridiculous. Why can't they list size options as small, medium and large like everyone else? No, no, at Starbucks, they're known as tall, grande and venti. Um, what?
Let's not forget they each cost like $15 a cup. Hmpf. Then there are all the shot and foam and topping options and whatnot. Ugh. No wonder the drive-through line is so long. Reading the board alone takes at least a half an hour. Sheesh!
OK, that's enough bratty Patty for one day. PK out.
-- Kimerer is a columnist who prefers Dunkin' coffee anyway, so there. Contact her at pkimerer@zoominternet.net.