When the lunch ladies served us tomato slices on our trays at Monroe Elementary School, I went back to tell them the sugar was missing. Mrs. Humphrey eyed me like she was trying to figure out the prank. “Nobody puts sugar on tomatoes.” “We do it all the time at home,” I said. She ...
Alarm clocks would be easier to ignore if bladders didn’t eavesdrop. It doesn’t matter how long or little I’ve been happily slumbering, the bell startles my bladder like a nervous bunny. It hops about, chanting, “Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now.” Pavlov’s dogs were chill ...
I grew up on a small family farm where we always had one beef in the freezer and the next fattening up in the barn. We dined on steak, pork and chicken. But NEVER crickets. Nor grasshoppers, mealworms nor grubs. If Mom found bugs crawling through the flour, out it went. Creepy crawlies had ...
The greatest advancement for modern man is the appreciation of the sexiness of dad bods. Face it, not many of us are going to discover our inner Chris “Thor” Hemsworth beneath all our layers of daddliness. Instead of “six-pack” abs, most of us sprout bellies sculpted more along the ...
Big Jim poked at the campfire. “Reckon we’ll get these cattle to the stockyard in two, three days.” Buck nodded. “S’long as we stay ahead of them rustlers. Ain’t enough of us to hold off them bandits.” Ol’ Cheyenne squinted at the dark horizon. “Somethin’s out there, mark ...
“The problem ain’t what people know. It’s what people know that ain’t so that’s the problem.” So said Will Rogers, the humorist and cowboy philosopher from the 1920s and ’30s who poked fun at human nature and politicians all while famously maintaining, “I never met a man I ...
