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Love a quarterback who is a loyal husband

Let the record show: I knew it all along. In fact, I called it. Ask anyone in my circle.

He’s like the Little Boy Who Cried Wolf. 12 times.

He’s also similar to those little swallows that keep flying back to Capistrano annually.

So, earlier this week when “Stupid Sexy Brady” (as my friend Colleen refers to him) announced that he is, in fact, NOT retiring, I was like, well duh.

“I knew my body, physically, could still do what it could do and obviously I have a love for the game, I think I’ll always have a love for the game,” the arm of the Tampa Buccaneers told ESPN.

Dude, I loved being a cheerleader in grade school and high school, but then I grew out of it. Not just the uniform but the concept of being a cheerleader forever, capisce?

OK, that’s a bad analogy but I think you get my point.

Tom Brady is like snow in a northeastern Ohio spring: neither one ever really fully goes away.

“I do think physically I’ll be able to do it. I just felt like there was still a place for me on the field.”

There IS still a place for you on the field … as a coach or sideline reporter. Heck, there’s a place for you up in the announcer / press box if you want it, I’m certain.

What about in one of his two New York condos, or his penthouse in Boston — hey doesn’t he have a $50 million house in Brentwood, California, too? No space in any of those mansions?

The Lord has been sooooooo good to him already. I mean, he has the looks of a chiseled Greek god. I hate that.

He’s married to freaking supermodel Gisele Bundchen with whom he has the adorable son Benjamin, now 11, and the beautiful daughter, Vivian, 8.

This, despite the fact that they started dating while he was still involved with his eldest son Jack’s mom, the lovely and talented actress Bridget Moynahan — the latter while she was pregnant with his son, BT Dubs.

Grrrrr.

I think that move lost Brady many female fans. OK, fine, maybe it was just me but I did NOT find that cool at all.

Then again, if Moynahan can forgive him and move on, I should, too.

But I can’t.

Probably because there are so many other great players who I believe deserve to be in contention for “best QB” who are, you know, loyal husbands:

・ San Francisco ’49ers tight end George Kittle who’s been with his wife Claire since they attended college together in Iowa.

・ Richard Sherman (Seattle Seahawks) who married Ashley Ross in March 2018, though they’ve been together since 2013.

・ Denver Broncos wide receiver Eric Decker, who has been the happy groom of country pop singer Jessie James since June 2013.

・ Bonus: our former (and possibly future?) beloved Cleveland son LeBron James. He may have dumped the Cavs to take his talents to LA, but at least he took his wife Savannah with him.

Still not sure I’m gonna take Bron back.

Hmpf.

Kimerer is a loyal mom, wife, and columnist who definitely still loves LeBron, just please don’t tell him. Tell her instead via www.patriciakimerer.com.

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