Celebrating Memorial, Er, I mean Labor Day
Well, clearly, I am in denial.
If I’ve done it once, I’ve done it two dozen times.
In fact, during the course of the weekly e-bulletin I write at my day job, I did it thrice.
THREE TIMES in a single newsletter!
Yep. Just as I do every year around this time, I keep accidentally referring to Labor Day as Memorial Day.
It’s not that Memorial Day shouldn’t be commemorated every single day of the year in honor of our military members who gave the ultimate sacrifice for our freedom.
And it’s not that Labor Day isn’t an important occasion for us to come together as a nation and be thankful for the many contributions of the American worker over past few centuries.
Both of those statements are true.
It’s just that, Labor Day is summer’s absolute death knell.
Sure, my sister’s been calling it fall since July 5 (stop it, Gina), but by the first weekend in September? Well, as Ellen Pompeo would say in character as Meredith back when McDreamy was still alive and “Grey’s Anatomy” was worth watching, it is SO over.
And I hate me the end of summertime, you dig?
I hate mourning my favorite, sun-kissed, Vitamin D-filled season.
I hate that there’s less daylight and that I have to use my car’s seat heater function on my way to work in the mornings.
I hate the thought that it will be snowing in a matter of WEEKS — oh yes, it will — and that the likelihood of seeing a day over 72 degrees Fahrenheit is kaput until June 2020.
I hate that the sun, for all intents and purposes (those being an ability to stay outdoors without a parka for more than four minutes and having ANY skin pigmentation whatsoever other than vampire, aka, Ohio, winter white) is heading south for winter with all the snowbirds.
Most of all, I hate saying goodbye to my kid in college for the next nine months.
However, even fall, with its paving the way toward winter objective, must have some good qualities, right?
Um … I’m thinking, I’m thinking!
Well, I don’t have to paint toenails as often during fall? And ditto shaving the legs or — for whom it may apply — the back, I suppose.
It’s suddenly boot season, so I can bust out those cute little Uggs I got on sale in July. Well, until the salt starts eating them and I’m forced to switch back to my cruddy puddle-jumpers from 2014. You know, the ones with the holes in the soles.
Ooh, I have a good one! I can finally buy my favorite creamer (sugar free peppermint mocha) again!
And I guess my hair’s a little less frizzy than it was during the apex of the summer humidity? At least until the snow starts matting it to my head.
Let’s see, red and orange leaves. Scarves. Bath & Bodyworks’ newest spin on ginger and pumpkin and apple- and marshmallow-scented everything.
Hallmark plays Christmas movies. We can have fires in the fireplace. Oh, and I’m all about the NBA returning, baby!
Best of all?
College swim season starts VERY soon. OK fall, you are forgiven. But winter? Aw, naw.
— Kimerer, of Boardman, is a Tribune Chronicle columnist who didn’t forget that Labor Day coincides with her wedding anniversary. Love ya, Ker! Check out pics of the 24-year newlyweds at www.patriciakimerer.com. Catch up with Patty’s past columns by clicking the “Life” tab at www.tribtoday.com