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I resolve to be more realistic (and reverse my balding)

January 1, 2012
By JOSHUA S. FLESHER - Tribune Chronicle ( , Tribune Chronicle |

Happy New Year! Strange, I'm writing this column in 2011, but it won't be seen until 2012. It feels almost like I'm looking into the future.

OK, it really doesn't feel that way and I am pretty certain that things will be pretty much the same today as they were four days ago.

However, if flying cars or hoverboards are invented and established as the norm in these next four days, I will happily write a correction in my next column.

It's 2012!

Today is the beginning of a brand new year, with an endless amount of possibilities and horizons for us to chase, the slate is clean and there is no where to go from here but forward.

I have no idea what any of that nonsense really means, but it gets you motivated to go out and actually try to follow through on a resolution.

See, my first resolution of 2012 has been broken as I decided I would no longer write this column about the holiday it was near because it's been done to death, but here I am, rambling about New Year's.

This isn't really about the New Year's holiday, but more about the reason and way that we all try to lie to ourselves each and every year only to give ourselves something else to be disappointed in later on.

Setting goals is a healthy and smart thing to do all year long and I understand the reason for picking the beginning of a new year to say that you will do something, but it makes very little sense to me.

For me to say that, this year, I'm going to do everything different. I'm going to lose a little weight, I'm going to work out and become the sculpted Adonis I know I can be, is a stretch.


Because I'm still the guy who likes to eat junky food, would rather spend his few free moments with his family and watching "The Simpsons" than in the gym, and no matter what I do, I'm still going bald!

I'm being somewhat tongue-in-cheek here, but the reality to me is that we all should be striving to better ourselves every single day.

I don't want to completely come down on the idea of picking a jump-off point to making changes in one's life because wanting to make yourself a better, healthier and happier person is important.

So, if we are going to set these goals for ourselves as the year changes from 2011 to 2012, I suppose I can use this time to tell you all, my faithful readers, the things that I am going to set before myself in 2012 for the sake of saying I did it.

Now, please remember, these are my resolutions, i.e. goals.

No. 1, I am going to experience a World Series Championship by my Cleveland Indians. I believe that a little positive thinking from my end will go a long way to shoring up that outfield and finding a reliable right handed hitter.

Second, I will not longer use vowels in my writing, because it is bound to make just as much sense as it does with them ... starting now. Ths s smthng tht cn b dn thrgh hrd wrk nd cncntrtn.

OK, that's impossible.

Third, I resolve to grow more hair on my rapidly expanding forehead!

These are all things that I can achieve!

Well, in truth, I would like to see 2012 be a year filled with as much excitement and joy as 2011 gave me. In 2012, I will be turning (AHHH) 30. In 2012, I will continue working to be the best father and husband I can be. And in 2012, I will strive to write a column that you all out there genuinely enjoy because that is why I'm here.

Happy New Year, everyone!



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