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Vegan Challenge Day 24: Dreaming of cheeseburgers

May 24, 2010 - Andy Gray

Here’s the dream that woke me up at 3 a.m. today:

I’m driving into Pennsylvania in the middle of the night. I don’t remember why. I turn around in the parking lot of a “Diners, Drive-in & Dives” kind of place.  I don’t remember buying anything in the dream, but there’s now a big sloppy cheeseburger with Monterey jack cheese, avocados and pickles and a huge chili dog on the seat next to me. I look at the burger and think, “Well, I can eat the pickle.” I pluck one off and put it in my mouth, but all I can taste are the beef juices that have saturated it. I wake up as I start to devour the burger.

That’s right, I’m now dreaming of cheeseburgers.

Maybe I’m dreaming about cheating because Day 23 was one on of those days where I adopted the philosophy, “It’s not cheating if I don’t know what’s in the food I’m eating.” See no dairy, hear no dairy, speak no dairy.

One of the first blogs I posted during the challenge was about how I’m a sucker for free food. Well, the only thing harder than resisting free food is not eating food for which I’ve already paid.

Sunday I went to my daughter’s choir banquet at Ciminero’s in Niles. I feared I’d be able to eat nothing but salad, but my wife was talking to the owner last week and discovered the spaghetti sauce isn’t cooked with meat. So I went to the banquet assuming I could at least eat pasta and salad.

There may not have been meat in the sauce, but there was cheese sprinkled on the top of the tray that was placed on the buffet. I decided to pull my pasta from the bottom, convinced that I dodged the cheese. I also was expecting mostaccioli, but the pasta was cavatelli. Some cavatelli is made with ricotta cheese. I decided this cavatelli wasn’t. There also wasn’t any egg in the cavatelli. At least that’s what I told myself.

I skipped the meatballs, the chicken, the cheesy potatoes and the cake. I decided the buttery taste on the mixed vegetables was a margarine that contained neither lactose nor whey.

I will make the same rationalizations tonight when I’m back at Ciminero’s for my daughter’s Key Club banquet. And when I go to sleep tonight, maybe I’ll get to finish the cheeseburger before I wake up.


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