Cake, ice cream smart choices for breakfast

Burt's Eye View

Last month, I brought you the extremely important scientific scoop that — despite what Mom claimed glopping oatmeal in your bowl — ice cream is the intelligent choice for breakfast. Ice cream makes your brain run as smoothly as cookies and cream.

The revelation raised serious questions among my more nutritionally minded readers.

“How can you eat ice cream for breakfast,” they asked, “without chocolate cake?”

Well, hang on, health nuts. It turns out you absolutely can have your ice cream for breakfast and eat it — the cake, I mean — too. It makes you smarter, skinnier and happier.

But we listened to our moms and grumbled down grapefruit and bran muffins instead. But science insists that it’s time to treat breakfasts like birthday parties. For our health.

First, a frozen recap:

In February, Yoshihiko Koga, a professor at Kyorin University in Mitaka, Japan, announced that a study there shows that eating ice cream right after waking up improves alertness and mental performance.

The university compared brain activity in people who gobbled ice cream immediately after getting out of bed against those who listened to Mom. Ice cream connoisseurs processed information better and showed less mental irritation.

It’s just possible, Yoshihiko warns, that it might have nothing to do with the ingredients “in the sense that ice cream is a treat that triggers positive emotions and added energy.”

That’s where cake — full of traditional breakfast fixings like eggs (omelets), milk (for cereal) and flour (pancakes) — comes in.

A study of nearly 1,000 people at Syracuse University shows that eating cake regularly improves memory and abstract thinking, according to Tips for Home. I mean, you’re eating cake for breakfast. Of course your thinking is delectably abstract.

A study at Tel Aviv University shows that chocolate cake breakfasters work more efficiently AND lost weight. The brain eats up calories like crazy to fire up when you wake up, so people who eat cake before 9 a.m. tend to lose weight, according to study guru Dr. Daniela Jakubowicz.

Of course it needs to be chocolate cake. Chocolate is chock-full of flavonoids, an extremely healthy substance found in plant-based foods. In other words, chocolate cake is like eating a salad, only delicious.

Chocolate, especially dark chocolate, reduces blood pressure, promotes a healthy heart, holds off aging and reduces stress. Cardiologist Dr. Franz Messerli reported in the New England Journal of Medicine there’s a “surprisingly powerful correlation” between how much chocolate a nation eats and how many Nobel Prize winners live there.

Switzerland leads the world in both per capita chocolate consumption and per capita Nobel winners. The United States comes in somewhere about the middle, so the message is clear — for your health, for your happiness and for your country, it is your savory duty to eat chocolate cake — and ice cream — for breakfast.

And because you can celebrate your birthday every day.

— Eat breakfast with Cole at or on the Burton W. Cole page on Facebook.